Finding Our Core Gifts

The quickest way to access your Core Gifts is by using the small moments of joy and meaning in your life as springboards. All of us, no matter how desperate our situation, experience moments when we feel nourished and inspired in our lives. We know when our heart feels particularly touched, when our spirit is quickened, when we feel loved, or when we are making a difference in someone’s life. Moments when we truly love who we are.

We can use these experiences in two important ways to change our lives and speed our intimacy journey. First, when we open to these positive experiences more fully and stay with them just a bit longer than we might normally do, we actually develop our capacity for love. These moments are more than moments; they are actually portals, and the more we enter into them, the more our ability to love grows.

Second, when we pay attention to the experiences that fill our hearts, we discover what types of interactions and experiences inspire us and encourage us to open up and trust. When we take the time to notice these patterns, it’s like a connect-the-dots game. What emerges is a picture of our Core Gifts.

— Ken Page, Deeper Dating, p. 40

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