Sonderquotes

The Child Inside

For that delightful, exuberant, lovable child in us to come out and play and show his or her beautiful face in moments of intimacy and closeness, that child first has to be found.  Secondly, that child must know that if he or she comes out to play he or she will be protected, valued, cherished, and cared for.  That the child in us must feel this way isn’t optional:  it’s essential and a prerequisite to intimacy.

– Melody Beattie, Beyond Codependency, p. 185

Our Inner Child Recognizes Truth

If we limit ourselves to the possible and provable, as I saw these people doing, we render ourselves incapable of change and growth, and that is something that should never end.  If we limit ourselves to the age that we are, and forget all the ages that we have been, we diminish our truth.

Perhaps it is the child within us who is able to recognize the truth of story — the mysterious, the numinous, the unexplainable — and the grown-up within us who accepts these qualities with joy but understands that we also have responsibilities, that a promise is to be kept, homework is to be done, that we owe other people courtesy and consideration, and that we need to help care for our planet because it’s the only one we’ve got.

I never want to lose the story-loving child within me, or the adolescent, or the young woman, or the middle-aged one, because all together they help me to be fully alive on this journey, and show me that I must be willing to go where it takes me, even through the valley of the shadow.

– Madeleine L’Engle, The Rock That Is Higher, quoted in Glimpses of Grace, collected by Carole F. Chase, February 21 entry

A Reservoir of Love

There may be some people in your life for whom you feel such love that you are already at stage four:  openhearted and ready to forgive.  Many of you, for instance, already feel forgiving toward your children.  Forgiving them does not mean that you approve of all that they do, but rather that you can acknowledge they have hurt you without making them your enemy.  You have a reservoir of love to draw upon that allows you to forgive them.  Once you forgive your children, you can let the insults go and work with them to resolve the problems.

– Dr. Fred Luskin, Forgive for Love, p. 75

Affecting Others

Each of us has a profound ripple effect on those around us.  When you are happy, you raise the vibration around you.  When you are resentful, you can drag down an entire party.  How do you want to influence those around you?

Your vibration is energetically broadcast to those around you — and to your children.  If you don’t want to get unstuck for yourself, do it for them.

– Christel Nani, Sacred Choices, p. 251

Reflecting God’s Love

Our children can see us.  They can’t see God.  Our function is not to describe God’s love or to talk endlessly about it, but to reflect it so that it can be seen.

– Hugh Prather, Spiritual Notes to Myself, p. 71

An Ancient Glory

Our aim is not to keep our child’s ego from getting mad at us — we are not anxiously building a relationship with our child.  And certainly we are not building a child.  We are gently brushing away the dust from an ancient glory, so that we both may stare in awe at what God has already made.

– Hugh Prather, Spiritual Notes to Myself, p. 65

Guiding Children

Every child will try out an unhappy approach to life from time to time.  We must be wise and not let this go too far.  Don’t react impulsively; act from your quiet knowledge of this child.  You are the advocate for his inner strength.  You step in and say no because you see that now he can do better.  From your intuition and calm perception, you see that he has learned all he can from the mistake and now can use a firm hand to guide him.

– Hugh Prather, Spiritual Notes to Myself, p. 64

Well-chosen Nos

Have as few nos as possible.  But do have a few.  A small child feels cuddled by a few well-chosen nos.

– Hugh Prather, Spiritual Notes to Myself, p. 64

Delight of Children

Children don’t admire an orchid more than a dandelion.

– Alexandra Stoddard, Choosing Happiness, p. 36-37