There will come a time in your relationship when your lover hurts you and you have to grieve the wound.\u00c2\u00a0 Perhaps your spouse has an affair, or you may simply be hurt by a fundamental difference in beliefs or habits.\u00c2\u00a0 Experiencing such pain does not mean there is anything wrong with you or the relationship. . .\u00c2\u00a0 A period of pain and anger will follow as you deal with the loss.\u00c2\u00a0 This period is commonly called “grieving,” and it’s an important part of the process of forgiveness.<\/p>\n
It is normal to experience emotional distress when our world is shaken.\u00c2\u00a0 It is also human nature to grieve losses and to suffer when we are mistreated. . . .<\/p>\n
Every time you disagree with or are hurt by your lover, you must acknowledge the pain you are dealing with.\u00c2\u00a0 Most of the time the pain will last only for a moment, and then you can remember why you love your partner, come up with a benign explanation, and get over it.\u00c2\u00a0 In those situations, the grief response will be very quick.\u00c2\u00a0 Your gut will suddenly feel tight, or there will be a swear word on your lips. . . .<\/p>\n
Not all difficulties, hoever, are ones that we can move through without an active and extended time of grieving.\u00c2\u00a0 The period of grief begins when we fully embrace the reality that there is a painful experience in our relationship that we do not want and we cannot change.\u00c2\u00a0 We accept our inability to make a change, and this acceptance allows us to then feel the sadness, anger, and fear that come with loss.<\/p>\n
An ability to grieve appropriately is a necessary part of a successful marriage, but many couples do not realize this.<\/p>\n
— Dr. Fred Luskin, Forgive for Love, <\/em>p. 173-174<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" There will come a time in your relationship when your lover hurts you and you have to grieve the wound.\u00c2\u00a0 Perhaps your spouse has an affair, or you may simply be hurt by a fundamental difference in beliefs or habits.\u00c2\u00a0 Experiencing such pain does not mean there is anything wrong with you or the relationship. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,21,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-503","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-forgiveness","category-healing","category-marriage"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/503","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=503"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/503\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=503"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=503"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=503"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}