{"id":5414,"date":"2018-01-22T23:05:03","date_gmt":"2018-01-23T03:05:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/?p=5414"},"modified":"2018-01-22T23:09:19","modified_gmt":"2018-01-23T03:09:19","slug":"a-gift-of-intimacy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/?p=5414","title":{"rendered":"A Gift of Intimacy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Everyone&#8217;s heard the self-help platitude &#8220;You must love yourself before you can love anyone else.&#8221;  This may sound wise, but it misses a great truth:  if we want to experience true intimacy, we need to be <em>taught<\/em> to love aspects of ourselves &#8212; again and again &#8212; by the people around us.  As much as most of us want to control our own destiny, the humbling truth is that sometimes the only way to learn self-love is by <em>being<\/em> loved &#8212; precisely in the parts of ourselves where we feel most unsure and tender.  When we are loved in such a way, we feel freedom and relief and permission to love in a deeper way.  No amount of positive self-talk can replicate this experience.  It is a gift of intimacy, not of willpower.  When we surround ourselves with people who honor our gifts and whose gifts we also honor, our lives blossom.<\/p>\n<p>&#8212; Ken Page, <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.sonderbooks.com\/Nonfiction\/deeper_dating.html\">Deeper Dating<\/a><\/em>, p. 72-73.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Everyone&#8217;s heard the self-help platitude &#8220;You must love yourself before you can love anyone else.&#8221; This may sound wise, but it misses a great truth: if we want to experience true intimacy, we need to be taught to love aspects of ourselves &#8212; again and again &#8212; by the people around us. As much as [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[25,15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5414","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-core-value","category-love"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5414","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5414"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5414\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5414"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5414"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5414"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}