{"id":5599,"date":"2018-03-18T15:45:35","date_gmt":"2018-03-18T19:45:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/?p=5599"},"modified":"2018-03-18T17:52:03","modified_gmt":"2018-03-18T21:52:03","slug":"desires-vs-entitlements","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/?p=5599","title":{"rendered":"Desires vs. Entitlements"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/Desire-to-Love.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/Desire-to-Love.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"266\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-5604\" srcset=\"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/Desire-to-Love.jpg 800w, https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/Desire-to-Love-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/Desire-to-Love-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Desires feature more positive motivation than entitlements.  If what you desire is based on your deeper values, the act of desiring makes you a better person.  For example, the desire to love makes you more lovable, that is, more loving and compassionate.<\/p>\n<p>Desire is appreciative, not entitled:  if I desire something I am more likely to appreciate it than if I feel entitled to it.  I&#8217;ll appreciate a bonus for my good work, but I&#8217;ll demand my contracted salary.  I&#8217;ll appreciate gifts, unless I feel entitled to them.  I&#8217;ll appreciate my partner&#8217;s help, praise, reward, affection, and support, which I very much want, as long as I don&#8217;t feel entitled to them because I &#8220;need&#8221; them.<\/p>\n<p>&#8212; Steven Stosny, PhD, <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.sonderbooks.com\/Nonfiction\/empowered_love.html\">Empowered Love<\/a><\/em>, p. 29-30<\/p>\n<p>[Photo:  Glenveagh, Ireland, July 2001.]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Desires feature more positive motivation than entitlements. If what you desire is based on your deeper values, the act of desiring makes you a better person. For example, the desire to love makes you more lovable, that is, more loving and compassionate. Desire is appreciative, not entitled: if I desire something I am more likely [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[25,15,27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5599","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-core-value","category-love","category-relationships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5599","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5599"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5599\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5599"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5599"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5599"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}