{"id":671,"date":"2008-11-30T23:31:24","date_gmt":"2008-12-01T03:31:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/2008\/11\/30\/nonsense\/"},"modified":"2008-11-30T23:31:24","modified_gmt":"2008-12-01T03:31:24","slug":"nonsense","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/?p=671","title":{"rendered":"Nonsense!"},"content":{"rendered":"

People who indulge in verbal abuse want to keep real <\/em>people out of their pretend world.\u00c2\u00a0 They want to turn real people into pretend people.\u00c2\u00a0 They feel they have succeeded if they can get the real person to try to explain him- or herself.\u00c2\u00a0 <\/em>If the real person tries to explain and argue against what the abuser is saying, the real person is acting as if the abuser’s world is <\/em>the real world, instead of a pretend one.\u00c2\u00a0 It is a “win” for the abuser because he or she has gotten someone to take his or her pretend world seriously.<\/p>\n

It is better to say, “Nonsense!” to verbal abuse (since it is nonsense) than to try to deal with the abuser in a logical way.\u00c2\u00a0 In other words, explaining why something said to you is wrong doesn’t keep the verbal abuser from abusing you.\u00c2\u00a0 When people indulge in verbal abuse, they are not being logical.\u00c2\u00a0 They are being irrational.\u00c2\u00a0 Verbal abuse is all pretend talk….<\/p>\n

Thinking about it, we know that no one lives inside another person, so no one knows our inner world.\u00c2\u00a0 But when someone tells us who we are or how we feel, or anything else about our inner world, our identity, how we do what we do, or how successful we’ll be, most of us feel as if we want to set them straight, correct them, or give them an explanation.\u00c2\u00a0 In other words, we want to talk to them as if they were in the real world with us.\u00c2\u00a0 But they are in a pretend world.<\/p>\n

— Patricia Evans, Teen Torment: Overcoming Verbal Abuse at Home and at School, <\/em>p. 21-23<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

People who indulge in verbal abuse want to keep real people out of their pretend world.\u00c2\u00a0 They want to turn real people into pretend people.\u00c2\u00a0 They feel they have succeeded if they can get the real person to try to explain him- or herself.\u00c2\u00a0 If the real person tries to explain and argue against what […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21,27,23],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-671","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-healing","category-relationships","category-truth"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/671","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=671"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/671\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=671"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=671"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sonderbooks.com\/sonderquotes\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=671"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}