By Their Fruits Ye Shall Know Them

Life, Truth 0

You can only distinguish truth from error in one way: namely, by the fruits that follow in your own life and the lives of those who proclaim what they call truth.  That is, if the new illumination gives you the power to love and trust God more than you did before; to love all your fellow men in the One Body of Mankind; and to long to treat them only as you wish to be treated yourself; this is how you may discern the truth.  If you are able to love even those who wound your feelings and misconstrue your intentions; to accept it all with no resentment, bitterness, or self-pity, but with praise and thanksgiving, just as Jesus would; if this new belief raises you to a still higher level of love than you had reached before, then you may be sure that what you have seen is not false, but a part of a higher truth that you have not yet seen fully. . . .

It is possible, however, that in the future you may believe that you have been shown a yet higher facet of truth and find yourself reacting to reproaches and misunderstanding with resentment or anger.  You may begin to feel superior to others and to forget that even those who attack you are members of the One Body of Mankind in whom the Lord of Love is also conscious.  You may begin to belittle or to denounce them and to exalt yourself in your own thoughts.  Then you may well doubt whether the new supposed truth is true after all.  For only what is true itself can deliver you and set you free from everything which is not of the truth, and which is unlike the Ideal of the Kingdom of Heaven.  So, remember, you can only discern between truth and falsity, the good and the evil, by the attitudes, reactions, and way of life which they awaken in you as you accept them.

— Hannah Hurnaud, Eagles’ Wings to the Higher Places, p. 52-53

The Truth

Relationships, Truth 0

Still, the truth with all its potential for causing pain is real and enduring — it won’t go away.  Unlike the confusing and ephemeral lie, the truth informs, clarifies, and teaches.  The truth feels right because it is right.

Even if the particular relationship they were in didn’t have a happy ending, the women who were told the truth were given a powerful gift.  They finally had a chance to understand what was really happening.  They had won another chance to build their future on more solid ground.  Although they had feared the truth, it was the lie and all it represented that had caused them and their partnerships the most grievous damage and robbed them of choice.

— Dory Hollander, PhD, 101 Lies Men Tell Women: And Why Women Believe Them, p. 270-271

Why Christian Universalism?

God, Truth 0

In conclusion, let me ask you to hold in your mind traditional Christian visions of the future, in which many, perhaps the majority of humanity, are excluded from salvation forever.  Alongside that hold the universalist vision, in which God achieves his loving purpose of redeeming the whole creation.  Which vision has the strongest view of divine love?  Which story has the most powerful narrative of God’s victory over evil?  Which picture lifts the atoning efficacy of the cross of Christ to the greatest heights?  Which perspective best emphasizes the triumph of grace over sin?  Which view most inspires worship and love of God bringing him honor and glory?  Which has the most satisfactory understanding of the divine wrath?  Which narrative inspires hope in the human spirit?  To my mind the answer to all these questions is clear, and that is why I am a Christian universalist.

— Gregory MacDonald, The Evangelical Universalist, p. 176-177

Synergy of Honesty

Marriage, Relationships, Truth 0

When the going gets tough, the tough get honest.  Lying and evading is the easy way out; honesty takes effort.  For one person, putting effort into the relationship means speaking up when feeling fragile.  For another, it means listening to a partner rather than bulldozing.  What is easy for one person may be a challenge for the other.

Usually those aspects of ourselves that we try to conceal — our personal demons — do shade how we come across.  We like to believe that what we lock away won’t affect us.  Actually, it’s like a radioactive leak:  Most of the time it does.

For many people, the hardest thing to say to a spouse is “I’m angry at you.”  They may feel it; they may communicate it obliquely, but they won’t admit to it.  The anger strikes too close to taboo emotions.  This may frustrate the other person because the anger is intuited but never confirmed….

When your partner doesn’t recoil from your darker feelings it kickstarts your own acceptance of yourself, and your own self-acceptance helps you to create a stronger bond.

By the Together as Two Stage, you can say to your partner, “It terrifies me to say this, but I have to tell you that I’m furious with you.”  The other person breathes a sign of relief because your words are congruent with what you portray.  Finally, the anger is out there!  At that moment, you and your partner are on the way to a special kind of synergy, primed for the type of healing only couples can give each other.

Because marriage is so interdependent, the growth potential is enormous — not by pleading or demanding, nor sitting at a drawing board, but through the models of integrity you provide for each other.  You can’t develop intimacy without involving and evolving yourself. . . .  You don’t generate growth, intimacy, or maturity from being polite to each other for fifty years.

— Ellyn Bader, PhD, and Peter T. Pearson, PhD, Tell Me No Lies, p. 214-216

What If Universalism Is Wrong?

God, Truth 0

But what if I am wrong in thinking that God will save everyone?  I said right at the start that I am a hopeful dogmatic universalist.  That is to say that, although, according to my theological system, God will save all people, I am not 100% certain that my system is correct.  So what if I am wrong?  Well, if I am wrong, then I will have inspired some false hope in the hearts of some people; but I do not think that I will have done any serious damage.  I have not produced a theology with a diminished view of God nor one that will lead people not to worship God.  I have not sidestepped the centrality of God’s work in Christ, so the cross and resurrection remain at the heart of the gospel.  I have not reduced the importance of faith in Christ nor the missionary calling of the church.  I have not undermined the authority of the Bible.  I have not “gone soft” on God’s wrath nor got rid of hell.  I have not tinkered with any key doctrines of orthodox Christianity.  If I am wrong, then anyone who mistakenly comes to think that I am right will love and worship the triune God, study and follow the Scriptures, proclaim Christ to the lost, and seek to walk in holiness, just like any non-universalist evangelical.  Hopefully, neither they nor those around them will be adversely harmed by their mistaken universalist beliefs.  I have made a provisional case for accepting universalism, but in the end one must make a wager and take a position.  Here I stand, and I can do no other.  I realize that most of my Christian family do not stand with me in the extent of my hope for the future, and I certainlly do not think that true Christian faith requires agreement with my views!  Belief in universalism is most certainly not a requirement for Christian orthodoxy, but neither does it amount to an exclusion from orthodoxy even if it is wrong.  I hope that this book may persuade some at least to tolerate evangelical universalism as a legitimate Christian position — a view that is true to the message of the gospel — even if they themselves feel unable to accept it.

— Gregory MacDonald, The Evangelical Universalist, p. 176

What If It Really Is True?

God, Life, Trials, Trust, Truth 0

But consider this:  What if you knew it would all turn out well, whatever you are facing?  What if Romans 8:28 really were more than a cliche?  What if it was a certainty, a Spirit-certified life preserver, an unsinkable objective truth, infinitely buoyant, able to keep your head above water even when your ship is going down?

What if it really worked?  What if it always worked?  What if there were no problems beyond its reach?

— Robert J. Morgan, The Promise:  How God Works All Things Together For Good, p. 3

Boundaries in Marriage

Letting Go, Marriage, Truth 0

Remember that a boundary always deals with yourself, not the other person.  You are not demanding that your spouse do something — even respect your boundaries.  You are setting boundaries to say what you will do or will not do.  Only these kinds of boundaries are enforceable, for you do have control over yourself.  Do not confuse boundaries with a new way to control a spouse.  It is the opposite.  It is giving up control and beginning to love.  You are giving up trying to control your spouse and allowing him to take responsibility for his behavior.

In a marriage, as in no other relationship, the need for revealing your boundaries is important.  Passive boundaries, such as withdrawal, triangulation, pouting, affairs, and passive-aggressive behavior, are extremely destructive to a relationship.  Passive ways of showing people that they do not have control over you never lead to intimacy.  They never educate the other on who you really are; they only estrange.

Boundaries need to be communicated first verbally and then with actions.

Not Ready to Hear

Letting Go, Relationships, Truth 0

When he told us not to cast our pearls before swine, for example, it was not to be mean but because he knew that swine cannot digest pearls; they do them no good (Matt. 7:6).  We, too, should have the good sense to refrain from giving people truth that they are not ready to receive, for it will do them no good.

— Richard J. Foster, Prayer, p. 232

Making a Point to Ourselves

Core Value, Healing, Truth 0

Trying excessively to make a point with another may mean that we have not yet made that point with ourselves.  Once we make that point with ourselves, once we understand, we will know what to do.

The issue is not about others understanding and taking us seriously.  The issue is not about others believing we’re good and good enough.  The issue is not about others seeing and believing how responsible or loving or competent we are.  The issue is not about whether others realize how deeply we are feeling a particular feeling.  We are the ones that need to see the light….

If I catch myself in the codependent trap of trying to emphasize something about myself to another, I will ask myself if I need to convince myself of that point.

— Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go, p. 204

Let Our Light Shine

Life, Truth 0

Let us remember that we are not here to convince men, but to let our light shine.

Knowledge is not necessarily light.  And it is light, not knowledge, that we have to spread.  The best thing we can do — infinitely the best, indeed the only thing — that men may receive the truth, is to be ourselves true.  Beyond all doing of good is the being good, for he that is good not only does good things, but all that he does is good.

— George MacDonald, Your Life in Christ, p. 213