The Vining Growth Plan

The key thing to know about Martin Luther, I think, is that every event of his life — like every event in yours and mine — was part of the vining growth plan of ups and downs God had devised for him.  God frightened him, pushed him, wound him round the Word.  As with Noah and Hezekiah and Jonah and others, many of the downturns of Luther’s life happened toward the end, when you’d think he’d be past all that badness, past his humanness, a completely godly man, producing the fullest and most mellow fruit.  But it’s God’s plan, not ours, after all, and we are not his equal.  As Job points out, “Who can bring what is pure from the impure?  No one!” — no one except God, of course, who can do the impossible and did it with me and goes around doing it all the time.

— Patty Kirk, Confessions of an Amateur Believer, p. 42-43

Relax

As soon as we try to control anything, we split our mind and lose our sense of inner comfort.  We can change what we bring to the people and circumstances surrounding us, but we can’t dominate them.

Perhaps the only approach that comes remotely close to a rule of life is that when you are relaxed and flexible, you are happy; when you are rigid and controlling, you are unhappy.  Therefore, the key is actually to let go of our urge to get people to behave and events to go our way.

No matter how experienced the psychologist, how learned the theologian, how wise the philosopher, or how holy the saint, none of them can control a two-year-old.

— Hugh Prather, The Little Book of Letting Go, p. 204

Get on With Your Life

Charlyne and I want you to “get on with your life.”  You do that by loving Jesus more each day, praying more, growing in Him, and trusting God for your every need.  We want you to be confident that God will bring about what He has promised.

— Bob Steinkamp, The Prodigal’s Pen, p. 251-252

Celebrate Small Successes

Stop and celebrate each of those small successes, each of those little steps we take on our journey to success.  Don’t skip over them, don’t rush through them, but take time to enjoy each as it comes.  It will encourage you and, most important, it will motivate you to keep going.

— Debbie Macomber, Knit Together:  Discover God’s Pattern for Your Life, p. 67

Recovery

“Getting our balance and keeping it once we have found it is what recovery is all about.  If that sounds like a big order, don’t worry.  We can do it.  We can learn to live again.  We can learn to love again.  We can even learn to have fun at the same time.”

— Melody Beattie, Codependent Do More, p. 214

Living Single

“It’s okay to be in a relationship, but it’s also okay to not be in a relationship.  Find friends to love, be loved by, and who think we are worthwhile.  Love ourselves and know we are worthwhile.  Use our time alone as a breather.  Let go.  Learn the lessons we are to be learning.  Grow.  Develop.  Work on ourselves, so when love comes along, it enhances a full and interesting life.  Love shouldn’t be the concern of our whole life or an escape from an unpleasant life.  Strive toward goals.  Have fun.  Trust God and His timing.  He cares and knows about all our needs and wants.”

— Melody Beattie, Codependent No More, p. 213-214

Have Some Fun!

“As codependents, we need to learn to play and enjoy ourselves.  Arranging for and allowing ourselves to have fun is an important part of taking care of ourselves.  It helps us stay healthy.  It helps us work better.  It balances life….  Fun is taking time to celebrate being alive.”

–Melody Beattie, Codependent No More, p. 199