God Must Reveal

God, Truth 0

Opinion is, at best, even the opinion of a true man, but the cloak of his belief, which he may indeed cast to his neighbor, but not with the truth inside it.  That remains in his own bosom, the oneness between him and his God.  St. Paul knows well — who better? — that by no argument, the best that logic itself can afford, can a man be set right with the truth.  He knows that the spiritual perception which comes of hungering contact with the living truth — a perception which is in itself a being born again — can alone be the mediator between a man and the truth.  He knows that, even if he could pass his opinion over bodily into the understanding of his neighbor, there would be little or nothing gained from it.  For the man’s spiritual condition would be just what it was before.

God must reveal, or nothing is known.  And this, through thousands of difficulties occasioned by the man himself, God is ever and always doing his mighty best to accomplish.

— George MacDonald, Your Life in Christ, p. 202-203

Willingness and Trust

God, Letting Go, Trust 0

Surrendering and letting go are about willingness and trust.  They’re about having enough faith to want something so much that we can taste it; then deliberately letting go of our desires and trusting our Higher Power to do for us what He wants, when He wants.  They’re about believing in God and His love for us even when it hurts….

We don’t have to surrender or let go perfectly.  We only need do it as well as we can, today.

— Melody Beattie, Beyond Codependency, p. 241

Questions

God, Life, Love 0

My faith in God, who is eternally loving and constant even as my understanding grows and changes, makes life not only worth living, but gives me the courage to dare to disturb the universe when that is what el calls me to do.  Sometimes simply being open, refusing to settle for finite answers, disturbs the universe.  Questions are disturbing, especially those which may threaten our traditions, our institutions, our security.  But questions never threaten the living God, who is constantly calling us, and who affirms for us that love is stronger than hate, blessing stronger than cursing.

— Madeleine L’Engle, Stone for a Pillow, p. 140, quoted in Glimpses of Grace, compiled by Carole F. Chase

The Great Joke

Letting Go, Life, Truth 0

“But of course!” said the Spirit, shining with love and mirth so that my eyes were dazzled.  “That’s what we all find when we reach this country.  We’ve all been wrong!  That’s the great joke.  There’s no need to go on pretending one was right!  After that we begin living.”

— from The Great Divorce, by C. S. Lewis

God’s Choice

God, Gratitude, Joy, Life, Marriage, Trust 0

For the Christian who has embraced God’s sovereignty, the choice is God’s; and the result, whatever that choice may be, is rejoicing.  In Him is our joy and peace.  If He gives marriage, then in marriage we rejoice.  If He gives singleness, we rejoice in singleness.  In whatever state we are, we know contentment.

— Margaret Clarkson, So You’re Single, p. 117

Surrendering

Letting Go 0

What is surrendering?  What does it mean to “let go”?  Surrendering is accepting; letting go is releasing.  Surrendering is acknowledging the authority of a Higher Power; letting go is trusting His authority.

What do we need to surrender to and let go of?  Our past, present, and future.  Our anger, resentments, fears, hopes, and dreams.  Our failures, successes, hate, love, and desires.  We let go of our time frame, our wants, sorrows, and joys.  We release our old messages, our new ones, our defects of character, and attributes.  We let go of people, things, and sometimes ourselves.  We need to let go of changes, changing, and the cyclical nature of love, recovery, and life itself.

We release our guilt and shame over being not good enough, and our desire to be better and healthier.  We let go of things that work out and things that don’t, things we’ve done, and things we haven’t done.  We let go of our unsuccessful relationships and our healthy relationships.  We let go of the good, the bad, the painful, the fun, and the exciting.  We surrender to and let go of our needs.  Often, a hidden need to be in pain and suffering is underneath our failed relationships, pain, and suffering.  We can let go of that too.  All of it must go.

Surrendering doesn’t mean we stop desiring the good.  It means that after acknowledging our desires, we relinquish them and get peaceful and grateful about circumstances, people, and our lives exactly as they are today.

— Melody Beattie, Beyond Codependency, p. 240

Finding Thrills

Letting Go, Life 0

What is more (and I can hardly find words to tell you how important I think this), it is just the people who are ready to submit to the loss of the thrill and settle down to sober interest, who are then most likely to meet new thrills in some quite different direction.  The man who has learned to fly and become a good pilot will suddenly discover music; the man who has settled down to live in the beauty spot will discover gardening.

This is, I think, one little part of what Christ meant by saying that a thing will not really live unless it first dies.  It is simply no good trying to keep any thrill: that is the very worst thing you can do.  Let the thrill go — let it die away — go on through that period of death into the quieter interest and happiness that follow — and you will find you are living in a world of new thrills all the time.  But if you decide to make thrills your regular diet and try to prolong them artificially, they will all get weaker and weaker, and fewer and fewer, and you will be a bored, disillusioned old man for the rest of your life.  It is because so few people understand this that you find many middle-aged men and women maundering about their lost youth, at the very age when new horizons ought to be appearing and new doors opening all round them.  It is much better fun to learn to swim than to go on endlessly (and hopelessly) trying to get back the feeling you had when you first went paddling as a small boy.

— C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Emerging Differences

Marriage, Relationships, Truth 0

At some point in a marriage, differences erupt.  It was pleasant to dwell in the fiction that nothing could blight the serenity you shared.  You could smirk at couples who argued, certain that you would never find yourselves at loggerheads.  But no more.  Troublesome topics that had been relegated to the background now clamor for attention.  Once one or both of you begin to divulge what’s important to you, you’ll land yourselves smack in the midst of some pretty rough strife.

Why go there?  Because it’s necessary.  Because after the intense togetherness of the Honeymoon Stage, there’s a need to assert separate desires.  Because, if you don’t, you’ll get drawn back into the dark side and feel smothered.  Because the realities of who your partner is and how you function together are hitting you in the face.  Because the old deceptions you had relied on for equilibrium don’t work any more.

And also because you’re intrigued by what you’re finding out about your partner.  You intuitively feel that your partner has something to teach you.  When you struggle through serious disagreement, you may understand and appreciate each other more deeply….

When you can deal with differences that arise, you will bring both tolerance and dynamism to your marriage.  If you suppress them, however, you’re setting yourself up for trouble….

The process of reckoning with differences is essential to the vitality of a relationship.  Couples need to know that they can work through conflict; otherwise, they’ll always live in fear of it.  Partners need to know that they can speak their minds; otherwise, they’ll bottle up everything, and wind up angry and estranged.  You must be able to own up to the lies that you’ve told yourself and each other.  If not, those lies will dominate the relationship.

— Ellyn Bader and Peter T. Pearson, Tell Me No Lies, p. 102-104