When we get hurt, no matter how serious the offense or how deep the wound, God has grace available to help us deal with the offense and forgive the offender. At that point, we have one of two choices: We can acknowledge our need and humbly reach out to Him for His grace to forgive and release the offender. Or we can resist Him, fail to receive His grace, and hold on to the hurt.
— Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Choosing Forgiveness, p. 75
“I’ve been a reference librarian for thirty-three years. I know more than I say about nearly everything.”
Mrs. Sobell in The Magic and the Healing, by Nick O’Donohoe, p. 116
Like drinking poison and hoping someone else would die. That’s a powerful word picture for what unforgiveness is like in the human heart. Though it may feel right, though it may seem justified, though it may appear to be the only option available to us, it is destructive and deadly to the one who drinks it. The very weapon we use to inflict pain on our offender becomes a sword turned inward on ourselves, doing far more damage to us — and to those who love us — than to those who have hurt us.
— Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Choosing Forgiveness: Your Journey to Freedom, p. 50-51
When we as God’s children realize that His grace is sufficient for every situation, that by the power of His indwelling Spirit we have the ability to respond with grace and forgiveness to those who have sinned against us — at that point we are no longer victims. We are free to rise above whatever may have been done to us, to grow through it, and to become instruments of grace, reconciliation, and redemption in the lives of other hurting people and even in the lives of our offenders.
Yes, we can be free — if we choose to be.
— Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Choosing Forgiveness, p. 42
Sometimes, you have to ask yourself what you really think, and go with that deep perception. If you find out you’re wrong, admit it and correct your error. If you find out you were right, congratulate yourself and move on. Either way, your starting point needs to be your sense of what’s true, not your gaslighter’s. If you’ve idealized your gaslighter and want to think well of him, you may be tempted to substitute his version of events for yours. But don’t. That’s how you start dancing the Gaslight Tango.
— Dr. Robin Stern, The Gaslight Effect, p. 174
You need to realize that when you sow the love of God, you will reap the love of God. You need to develop faith in this spiritual law — even though you may not harvest it from the field in which you sowed, or as quickly as you would like.
— John Bevere, The Bait of Satan: Living Free from the Deadly Trap of Offense, p. 14-15
Knitting is love, looped and warm.
Stephanie Pearl-McPhee, Yarn Harlot, p. xiii
Acknowledging your gifts and talents fills you with a sense of self-esteem — so you are not consumed by the need for approval to boost your reputation. It allows you to own your personal power and not give it away to others. When you have good self-esteem — which you develop by making commitments to yourself that you keep, valuing your personal code of honor, owning your gifts and talents, and letting go of false humility — you do not look for attention or validation from others….
The false modesty of ignoring or downplaying your gifts and talents is a slap in God’s face. You received a gift, yet will not own it.
— Christel Nani, Sacred Choices, p. 240-241
I love knitting because it’s something that can be accomplished no matter how poorly it’s going at any given moment. It’s a triumph of dexterity over string. I can’t make my kids turn out the way I want; I have no control over my editor; world peace remains elusive despite my very best efforts; but all of that be damned — I can put a heel in a sock and it will go exactly the way I want it to go. Eventually, at least.
Stephanie Pearl-McPhee, Yarn Harlot: The Secret Life of a Knitter, p. xiii
Whenever you forget to nurture and care for yourself because it feels selfish, your level of resentment will rise….
You must take personal responsibility for your level of self-care — that means not blaming others because you are stuck cleaning the garage while your husband is off playing golf. Why are you not doing what you want to be doing?…
Remember to look for the subtle ways you forget to honor yourself. If you come last in your life, your level of resentment will be high.
— Christel Nani, Sacred Choices, p. 234-235