Review of Universalism, the Prevailing Doctrine of the Christian Church During Its First Five Hundred Years: With Authorities and Extracts, by John Wesley Hanson

Christian, Nonfiction Review, Starred Review 0

Universalism, the Prevailing Doctrine of the Christian Church During Its First Five Hundred Years: With Authorities and Extracts

by John Wesley Hanson

Universalist Publishing House, Boston and Chicago, 1899. 321 pages.
Starred Review

The title of this book well sums up what it’s about. This is not a book for the general reader. This is a reprint of a book in the public domain, originally published in 1899. The language is dense and old-fashioned.

When it first dawned on me that George MacDonald was teaching that all will (eventually) be saved, I was surprised. He clearly believed this is what the Bible teaches. But how could he think that? Doesn’t the Bible teach that the wicked will perish and burn eternally? Isn’t that what all good Christians think?

So, I reread the Bible and saw how much was open to interpretation. At the time, I thought the case for either view was about equal. (Since then, I think it’s actually stronger for universalism.) I chose to believe the view that I thought had a higher view of God. If it bothers me that God would send people to burn in hell forever and ever, should I believe in that God? It also meant that I can’t write off other people nearly as easily as before.

But I still thought I was bucking tradition believing this. So I was amazed and delighted to read this book, showing with many examples that the early church believed all will be saved. That the “mainstream” view was not at all mainstream until about 500 years after Christ. In fact, when the church was dominated by those who spoke Greek, it was also dominated by Universalism.

Now, this book is dense, as I said. It’s only for people like me, whose biggest obstacle in believing in Universalism is thinking that it’s not Biblical, and is against the mainstream view of the church. This book shows that not only did a deeply spiritual man like George MacDonald think that Universalism is Biblical, so did Christ’s first followers. It’s for people who deeply believe in the authority of Scripture.

I had to laugh when I read this paragraph in the Foreword:

“The first form of his manuscript contained a thousand copious notes, with citations of original Greek and Latin, but such an array was thought by judicious friends too formidable to attract the average reader, as well as too voluminous, and he has therefore retained only a fraction of the notes he had prepared.”

I laughed because the book is still formidable indeed, and not at all for the average reader. But there’s excellent information here, and Christians who wonder about the Biblical basis for Universalism will have their eyes opened.

Also in the Foreword, the author states:

“The purpose of this book is to present some of the evidence of the prevalence in the early centuries of the Christian church, of the doctrine of the final holiness of all mankind. The author has endeavored to give the language of the early Christians, rather than to paraphrase their words, or state their sentiments in his own language. He has also somewhat copiously quoted the statements of modern scholars, historians and critics, of all shades of opinion, instead of condensing them with his own pen.”

This is why the book is formidable, but it’s also why it is most convincing and thorough.

The author’s purpose is not to present the Scriptural evidence for Universalism. “Neither is it the purpose of the author of this book to write a history of the doctrine; but his sole object is to show that those who obtained their religion almost directly from the lips of its author, understood it to teach the doctrine of universal salvation.”

When my pastor talked about Love Wins, by Rob Bell, which teaches Universalism, he said that he did not agree with Rob Bell’s conclusion. But I loved that he said, “Shouldn’t we want to believe it?” In many ways this book gives me permission to believe that all will be saved. After all, if the early church fathers believed it, how can I possibly contend that it’s not Biblical?

The book goes into great, convincing, and, yes, tedious detail. I’ll present a few of the points.

First, he looks at the oldest creeds. There’s simply nothing about everlasting punishment.

“Thus the credal declarations of the Christian church for almost four hundred years are entirely void of the lurid doctrine with which they afterwards blazed for more than a thousand years. The early creeds contain no hint of it, and no whisper of condemnation of the doctrine of universal restoration as taught by Clement, Origen, the Gregories, Basil the Great, and multitudes besides.”

He does look at the teachings of the church fathers listed above in great detail. I’ll list some paragraphs that give some insight into his arguments:

“The talismanic word of the Alexandrian fathers, as of the New Testament, was Father. This word, as now, unlocked all mysteries, solved all problems, and explained all the enigmas of time and eternity. Holding God as Father, punishment was held to be remedial, and therefore restorative, and final recovery from sin universal.”

“The Greek Fathers derived their Universalism directly and soley from the Greek Scriptures. Nothing to suggest the doctrine existed in Greek or Latin literature, mythology, or theology; all current thought on matters of eschatology was utterly opposed to any such view of human destiny. And, furthermore, the unutterable wickedness, degradation and woe that filled the world would have inclined the early Christians to the most pessimistic view of the future consistent with the teachings of the religion they had espoused. To know that, in those dreadful times, they derived the divine optimism of universal deliverance from sin and sorrow from the teachings of Christ and his apostles, should predispose every modern to agree with them.”

I thought this part about the Greek words used was fascinating:

“When our Lord spoke, the doctrine of unending torment was believed by many of those who listened to his words, and they stated it in terms and employed others, entirely different, in describing the duration of punishment, from the terms afterward used by those who taught universal salvation and annihilation, and so gave to the terms in question the sense of unlimited duration.

“For example, the Pharisees, according to Josephus, regarded the penalty of sin as torment without end, and they stated the doctrine in unambiguous terms. The called it eirgmos aidios (eternal imprisonment) and timorion adialeipton (endless torment), while our Lord called the punishment of sin aionion kolasin (age-long chastisement).

“The language of Josephus is used by the profane Greeks, but is never found in the New Testament connected with punishment. Josephus, writing in Greek to Jews, frequently employs the word that our Lord used to define the duration of punishment (aionios), but he applies it to things that had ended or that will end. Can it be doubted that our Lord placed his ban on the doctrine that the Jews had derived from the heathen by never using their terms describing it, and that he taught a limited punishment by employing words to define it that only meant limited duration in contemporaneous literature?”

The author goes on to give many examples of the different terms used in Greek at the time of Christ.

“Had our Lord intended to inculcate the doctrine of the Pharisees, he would have used the terms by which they described it. But his word defining the duration of punishment was aionion, while their words are aidion, adialeipton and athanaton. Instead of saying with Philo and Josephus, thanaton athanaton, deathless or immortal death; eirgmon aidion, eternal imprisonment; aidion timorion, eternal torment; and thanaton ateleuteton, interminable death, he used aionion kolasin, an adjective in universal use for limited duration, and a noun denoting suffering issuing in amendment. The word by which our Lord describes punishment is the word kolasin, which is thus defined: “Chastisement, punishment.” “The trimming of the luxuriant branches of a tree or vine to improve it and make it fruitful.” “The act of clipping or pruning — restriction, restraint, reproof, check, chastisement.” “The kind of punishment which tends to the improvement of the criminal is what the Greek philosophers called kolasis or chastisement.”

This close look at the Greek background makes it all the more interesting that the teaching of Universalism prevailed while the church fathers were primarily Greek-speaking.

Some other interesting points:

“Not a writer among those who describe the heresies of the first three hundred years intimates that Universalism was then a heresy, though it was believed by many, if not by a majority, and certainly by the greatest of the fathers.

“Not a single creed for five hundred years expresses any idea contrary to universal restoration, or in favor of endless punishment.”

“While the councils that assembled in various parts of Christendom, anathematized every kind of doctrine they supposed to be heretical, no ecumenical council, for more than five hundred years, condemned Universalism, though it had been advocated in every century by the principal scholars and most revered saints.”

“The first defense of Christianity against Infidelity (Origen against Celsus) puts the defense on Universalistic grounds. Celsus charged the Christians’ God with cruelty, because he punished with fire. Origen replied that God’s fire is curative; that he is a “Consuming Fire,” because he consumes sin and not the sinner.”

Believe me, the author goes into excruciating detail to back up these, and many other points. He looks at a multitude of ancient writings and commentaries on the writings.

So, reader, you will know if this book would be interesting to you. It was definitely interesting to me, though I had to take it slowly! But I feel much much less out of the mainstream than I did before. To me, it definitely establishes that a Christian can believe the Bible and still believe in Universalism. After all, is there anyone who would say those early church fathers were not Christians? And if those native Greek speakers believed the Bible taught universalism, who are we to say different?

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Source: This review is based on a book I purchased via Amazon.com.

Review of Lulu and the Brontosaurus, by Judith Viorst

Beginning Chapter Books, Children's Fiction Review, Humorous, Readalouds, Starred Review 0

Lulu and the Brontosaurus

by Judith Viorst
illustrated by Lane Smith

Atheneum Books for Young Readers, New York, 2010. 113 pages.
Starred Review

Last September, at the National Book Festival, I got to hear Judith Viorst read from this book, and I was eager to get my hands on it from that moment on.

This is definitely a book that begs to be read aloud. The biggest catch is that it’s really too long for preschool story time. Still, I think any elementary school teacher or librarian could have an entire classroom eating out of the palm of their hand by reading this book.

I must say that Lane Smith was the absolutely perfect choice for illustrating this book. The pictures match the irreverent, over-the-top tone and make the story absolutely right. (I wonder what would have happened if Lane Smith had illustrated Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? Anyway, that book’s so good, I wouldn’t change a thing — and this book is the same.)

This book is perfect for reading aloud because the author takes an irreverent, in-your-face, obtrusive tone. The very first page sets the tone. (Imagine typefaces to match.)

“OKAY! All right! You don’t have to tell me! I know!

“I know that people and dinosaurs have never lived on Earth at the same time. And I know that dinosaurs aren’t living now. I even also know that paleontologists (folks who study dinosaurs) decided that a dinosaur that was once called a brontosaurus (a very nice name) shouldn’t be called brontosaurus anymore, and changed it to apatosaurus (a kind of ugly name). But since I’m the person writing this story, I get to choose what I write, and I’m writing about a girl and a B R O N T O S A U R U S. So if you don’t want to read this book, you can close it up right now — you won’t hurt my feelings. And if you still want to read it, here goes:

“Chapter One

“There once was a girl named Lulu, and she was a pain. She wasn’t a pain in the elbow. She wasn’t a pain in the knee. She was a pain — a very big pain — in the b u t t.”

Okay, I went on past the first page. But since this is my review, and I’m the one writing it, I can do what I want. Oops. The style’s rubbing off on me.

Well, Lulu decides she wants a brontosaurus for a birthday present. Her parents, who are used to indulging her every whim, are stymied as to how to comply. They end up actually telling Lulu “No.” Lulu, predictably, throws a fit.

“Four days, eight days, ten days, twelve days passed. Lulu kept saying, ‘I WANT A BRONTOSAURUS.’ Her mom and her dad just kept on saying no. Lulu kept screeching and throwing herself on the floor and kicking her heels and waving her arms. Lulu’s mom and her dad kept saying no. Until finally, on the thirteenth day, the day before Lulu’s birthday, right after lunch, Lulu said to her mom and her dad, ‘Okay then, foo on you.’ (She had terrible manners.) ‘If you aren’t going to get me a brontosaurus, I’m going out and getting one for myself.'”

So Lulu sets off into the forest, singing:

“I’m gonna, I’m gonna, I’m gonna, gonna get
A bronto-bronto-bronto Brontosaurus for a pet.
I’m gonna, I’m gonna, I’m gonna, gonna get
A bronto-bronto-bronto Brontosaurus for a pet.”

She encounters various dangerous creatures, and gets the better of all of them with her pugnacious ingenuity — until at last she meets a brontosaurus.

And when she meets the brontosaurus, whom she calls Mr. B, there is a lovely reversal that teaches Lulu a nice lesson.

Just to keep things interesting (as if they weren’t already!), the author gives us a choice of three endings, so the reader can decide for themselves how happily to let things end. And did I mention the perfect illustrations on almost every set of pages?

As I look through this book again, I notice that besides being a phenomenal read-aloud, it’s also a true stand-out in the elusive category of chapter books for beginning readers. The chapters are extremely short — usually only a couple pages; there are lots of pictures; but the story is completely delightful and absorbing. Definitely a non-threatening and highly enjoyable reading experience.

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Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Childrens_Fiction/lulu_and_the_brontosaurus.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a library book from the Fairfax County Public Library.

Review of Son of the Shadows, by Juliet Marillier

Fantasy, Fiction Review, Starred Review 0

Son of the Shadows

by Juliet Marillier

Book Two in the Sevenwaters Trilogy
TOR Fantasy, New York, 2001. 590 pages.
Starred Review

I very greatly enjoyed Juliet Marillier’s young adult books, Wildwood Dancing and Cybele’s Secret, but these books about the ancient Irish tuath of Sevenwaters have me completely enthralled.

Son of the Shadows takes up the tale with Fiadan, the daughter of Sorcha, the heroine of Daughter of the Forest. Fiadan and her twin brother Sean are sixteen, and the people of Sevenwaters are feeling uneasy. It seems an old evil is awakening, and they aren’t sure how it will break out.

Sean is training to be the next chief of Sevenwaters, after their uncle Liam. The family still wants to win back their sacred islands from the British family of Northwoods. Sean thinks there is no point in waiting for the prophecy to come true.

Fiadan, like her mother, is a healer, and she’s blessed, or cursed, with The Sight. But Fiadan doesn’t quite fit into the pattern that the Fair Folk seem to be manipulating. In Daughter of the Forest, the Fair Folk did a lot of directing in the background. In this book, Fiadan doesn’t like the requests and commands the Fair Folk give her, and she makes her own choices. But will it mean disaster for her family?

After I read this book, I decided that this series is too good — I am going to order my own copy of the next book, and a copy of this book while I am at it. I know I will want to reread them. Fiadan feels like a precious friend. I want her to succeed! I want to find out what happens to her family next.

Juliet Marillier writes an intricately plotted novel that feels like a beautiful tapestry. There are many places where the characters tell stories, and they are always pertinent to the tale. I like this paragraph where Liadan defends telling tales to the chief of a band of outlaws:

“If what you want is to achieve a victory, what better to inspire your men than a heroic tale, some tale of a battle against great odds, won by skill and courage? If your men are weary or downhearted, what more fit to cheer them than a foolish tale — say, the story of the wee man Iubdan and the plate of porridge, or the farmer who got three wishes and squandered them all? What better to give them hope than a tale of love?”

As for me, I found no better therapy when recovering from a stroke than to read this tale of love and adventure and danger and treachery and loyalty and courage.

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Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Fiction/son_of_the_shadows.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a library book from the Fairfax County Public Library.

Review of Guyku, by Bob Raczka

Children's Nonfiction Review, Poetry, Starred Review 0

Guyku

A Year of Haiku for Boys

by Bob Raczka
illustrated by Peter H. Reynolds

Houghton Books for Children, Boston, 2010. 48 pages.
Starred Review

At the end of this book, Bob Raczka explains why he wrote Guyku, a collection of haiku for boys.

“Now that I’m a grownup (sort of), I realize that haiku is a wonderful form of poetry for guys like us. Why? Because haiku is an observation of nature, and nature is a place where guys love to be….

“One more thing about haiku: they’re written in the present tense. In other words, whatever happens in a haiku, it’s happening right now. From my experience, guys are always interested in what’s happening right now.

“In case you were wondering, every haiku in this book is about something I did as a boy. Or something I’ve seen my own boys do. It’s the kind of stuff I — along with amazing and inspiring illustrator Peter H. Reynolds — wanted to share with guys like you.”

The poems are wonderful, with a section for each of the four seasons. The illustrations beautifully capture the playful, adventurous spirit expressed in the haiku. I’ll give an example from each season, but please remember that the illustrations make them all the more wonderful!

Spring:

“In a rushing stream,
we turn rocks into a dam.
Hours flow by us.”

Summer:

“Pine tree invites me
to climb him up to the sky.
How can I refuse?”

Fall:

“Hey, who turned off all
the crickets? I’m not ready
for summer to end.”

Winter:

“Winter must be here.
Every time I open my
mouth, a cloud comes out.”

Check this book out and share it with a guy in your life!

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Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a library book from the Fairfax County Public Library.

Review of Drink, Slay, Love, by Sarah Beth Durst

Paranormal, Starred Review, Teen Fiction Review 0

Drink, Slay, Love

by Sarah Beth Durst

Margaret K. McElderry Books, New York, 2011. 386 pages.
Starred Review

I normally am not much of a fan of vampire books. In fact, I enjoyed the Twilight series because it didn’t read like a vampire book at all. I almost quit on this book after the first two chapters, but I like Sarah Beth Durst’s writing so much, I decided to persevere. I was glad I did!

In the world of Drink, Slay, Love vampires are not sparkly and nice. They have the traditional features of not having reflections, hating holy water, and combusting if they are exposed to sunlight. Pearl and her Family do hide from humans in their mansion with underground catacombs. But at night they go out and feed. It turns out that vampire venom causes wounds to heal quickly and also causes humans to forget. So they can prey on the same humans often, and no one is the wiser.

Pearl’s family has been selected to host an upcoming Fealty Ceremony for the King of New England, so they need to prepare a large feast. But soon after they get the news, Pearl gets stabbed by a unicorn.

Her Family doesn’t believe her. Of course unicorns don’t exist. They think some slayer came after her. But then Pearl discovers that now she can walk around in daylight. Her family is appalled, but they think of a way they can use this turn of events.

“‘You will solve a problem for us,’ Mother said. She began to smile too. This was more alarming than Daddy’s smile. Pearl wasn’t sure she had ever seen Mother’s face curve into a smile. It looked unnatural, as if the porcelain-doll face had cracked. Her eyes didn’t change. Only her lips curved.

“‘Oh?’ Pearl said. ‘Wonderful.’

“‘For the Fealty Ceremony, we need to supply enough humans for the king and his guards to quench their thirst. However, obtaining the dozen humans needed with our current hunting grounds is problematic at best and extremely risky at worst,’ Daddy said. ‘One or two at a time can always be managed, but that many at once . . .’

“Mother chimed in, ‘Our hope is that with this new development, new opportunities will present themselves.’

“‘You want me to find the king’s dinner in daylight?’ Pearl guessed.

“‘Precisely,’ Mother said.

“Daddy smiled. ‘We want you to attend high school.'”

However, Pearl is changing. Could she be developing a conscience? And she’s actually beginning to make friends. Can she really give them up for the king’s feast? But if she doesn’t, her Family will kill her.

I ended up enjoying this book very much indeed. I did laugh when an element came up that I’ve found in Sarah Beth Durst’s other books, Ice and Enchanted Ivy. It’s an element I really enjoy, though. This time there’s a rather major plot point involved, so I won’t give it away. People who are up on unicorn terminology (for example those who have read Diana Peterfreund’s Rampant) may suspect, but they’ll still enjoy it when all is revealed.

Sarah Beth Durst knows how to write fun books. Enchanted Ivy was good-hearted fun playing off the gargoyles of Princeton. This book has good-hearted fun playing off all the traditional vampire (and unicorn) tropes. I thoroughly enjoyed it, even though it was a vampire story.

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Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Teens/drink_slay_love.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a book sent to me by the publisher.

Review of The Pericles Commission, by Gary Corby

Fiction Review, Historical, Mystery, Starred Review 0

The Pericles Commission

by Gary Corby

Minotaur Books, New York, 2010. 335 pages.
Starred Review

The Pericles Commission has one of the best first sentences ever:

“A dead man fell from the sky, landing at my feet with a thud.”

The story that follows is an intriguing murder mystery, set in the political turmoil of ancient Athens establishing democracy.

That was enough information for me to know I wanted to read this book. I was not disappointed. The mystery is satisfying and action-packed. And there’s plenty of historical details to make you believe this could really happen. Our hero, the narrator Nicolaos, even meets a spunky priestess who gets involved in the mystery, and the author gives us reasons in the notes at the end why her role is actually believable.

One thing I loved about the book was how Gary Corby mixed in actual people who lived in Athens at the dawn of democracy, and explained in an Author’s Note how it could all have been true. The dead body in the first sentence belonged to Ephialtes, who really did bring democracy to Athens and really was murdered days later. And there really were political reasons for powerful people to have him killed — which Gary Corby brings to play in his book.

Pericles is the politician who gives Nicolaos a commission to solve the crime, and more and more comes to be at stake for Nicolaos. But my favorite real-life character is the annoying little brother who asks lots and lots of questions: His name is Socrates.

There’s a list of characters in the front, which helps keeping the Greek names straight. Stars beside the names of the actual people show up on more than half of the names in the list. So besides getting an excellent mystery, readers also learn a lot about ancient Athens, in a much more memorable way than a text book.

One thing I do feel bad about: I liked the start of this book so much, I ended up buying a copy. My son has always loved stories of ancient Greece, so I want him to read it. That’s not the bad part. The bad part is that once I finished reading it, it’s taken me months to actually write the review, since it’s not a library book and doesn’t have a due date. I hope to do much better when the sequel, The Ionia Sanction, comes out next month. I’m pre-ordering it today, in fact.

PS: Even worse, I wrote this review last month and didn’t get it posted until now! When I heard that the Ionia Sanction is out (Where’s my copy, Amazon?), I thought it was HIGH time I finally posted this review! I loved this book! Don’t let my slowness make you miss it!

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Source: This review is based on a book I purchased and gave to my son (but read before he did).

Review of Haiti After the Earthquake, by Paul Farmer

Current Issues, Nonfiction Review, Starred Review 0

Haiti

After the Earthquake

by Paul Farmer

PublicAffairs, New York, 2011. 431 pages.
Starred Review

I first heard of Dr. Paul Farmer’s work, bringing health care to poor people all over the world, when I read the books Strength in What Remains and Mountains Beyond Mountains, both by Tracy Kidder.

Paul Farmer has been working in Haiti for decades, doing excellent work there. So when I heard that he had written a book called Haiti After the Quake, I made sure I got my hands on it quickly.

This book tells a sad story of devastation, but ultimately it’s a hopeful book, with a bright outlook for Haiti’s future. It does point out problems with the many non-governmental organizations working in Haiti. For Haiti to thrive, the government needs to be able to provide basic services like water, transportation infrastructure, and healthcare. But he presents good directions to head in the future.

To add to the in-depth analysis, after Dr. Farmer’s section, there are chapters written by eleven distinguished guest writers, many of whom were in Haiti on the day of the quake, and all of whom have a valuable perspective.

This is an important book, and a thoughtful and well-written one.

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Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Nonfiction/haiti_after_the_earthquake.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a library book from the Fairfax County Public Library.

Review of Beauty Queens, by Libba Bray

Contemporary, Current Issues, Humorous, Starred Review, Teen Fiction Review 0

Beauty Queens

by Libba Bray

Scholastic Press, New York, 2011. 396 pages.
Starred Review

Okay, this book is hilarious, laugh-out-loud funny. It is irreverent, has frank sexuality of different types, and makes fun of people who give easy answers — including a Christian leading a song “Jesus is my Co-pilot” while their plane crashes. However, most of the things the author makes fun of fully deserve to be made fun of. The book mostly mocks our corporate culture and the messages we send to women about their bodies and their sexuality. And the book is definitely funny. Did I mention that it made me laugh out loud?

I love Libba Bray from the moment I heard her speech at the 2010 Printz Awards. Funny irreverence is where she shines, and in this book, she harnesses it all into a rollicking tale of survival.

The story is about a group of survivors of a plane crash on a desert island. The plane was filled with Miss Teen Dream contestants, and all the adults (and most of the contestants) die in the crash. But don’t worry! I’ll give you the first page or so, so you’ll know it’s a Happy Story:

“A WORD FROM YOUR SPONSOR

“This book begins with a plane crash. We do not want you to worry about this. According to the U.S. Department of Unnecessary Statistics, your chances of dying in a plane crash are one in half a million. Whereas your chances of losing your bathing suit bottoms to a strong tide are two to one. So, all in all, it’s safer to fly than to go to the beach. As we said, this book begins with a plane crash. But there are survivors. You see? Already it’s a happy tale. They are all beauty queen contestants. You do not need to know their names here. But you will get to know them. They are all such nice girls. Yes, they are nice, happy, shining, patriotic girls who happen to have interests in baton twirling, sign language, AIDS prevention in the animal population, the ancient preparation of popadam, feminine firearms, interpretive dance, and sequins. Such a happy story. And shiny, too.

“This story is brought to you by The Corporation: Because Your Life Can Always Be Better (TM). We at The Corporation would like you to enjoy this story, but please be vigilant while reading. If you should happen to notice anything suspicious in the coming pages, do alert the proper authorities. Remember, it could be anything at all — a subversive phrase, an improper thought or feeling let out of its genie bottle of repression, an idea that challenges the status quo, the suggestion that life may not be what it appears to be and that all you’ve taken for granted (malls, shopping, the relentless pursuit of an elusive happiness, prescription drug ads, those annoying perfume samples in magazines that make your eyes water, the way anchormen and women shift easily from the jovial laughter of a story about a dog that hula-hoops to a grave report on a bus crash that has left five teenagers dead) may be no more consequential than the tattered hem of a dream, leaving you with a bottomless, free-fall feeling.

“This is the sort of thing we are warning you about.

“But let’s not worry, shall we? There’s nothing to worry about. Though there is the threat of war, it happens in the background, in snippets on the nightly news between ads for sinus medicines. It’s none of our concern. This is a happy story.

“Now, our story begins, as many happy stories do, with a blue, blue sky. A blue, blue sky punctuated by thick white clouds; they drift across the expanse like semicolons, reminding us that there is more to come. The pilot, a man in his forties who once stayed on a mechanical bull for a full eight seconds, has just turned off the FASTEN SEAT BELTS sign. The flight is on its way to a remote tropical paradise where the girls will compete against one another for the title of Miss Teen Dream.

“Oh dear. Compete is a rather ugly word, isn’t it? After all, these are such lovely girls, pure of heart and high of spirits. Let’s say that they will be ‘drawing on their personal best,’ and some girls will ‘proceed on a path of Miss Teen Dreamdom’ while others will ‘have the option to explore other pageant opportunities elsewhere at an unspecified future time.’ Ah. There. That’s much better, isn’t it?”

That should give you the idea. If the above strikes you funny, you will enjoy this book, because that is just the beginning.

When twelve girls find themselves on a beach after the plane crash, Taylor Rene Krystal Hawkins, Miss Teen Dream Texas, organizes them into two teams, The Sparkle Ponies and The Lost Girls, to find out what they have and deal with the situation. They’re determined to stay Pageant-ready until they are rescued. But rescue is not quick in coming.

Here’s the scene when the Lost Girls come back and report that there are no survivors at the plane crash site:

“Taylor’s sharp clap echoed on the beach, ‘Teen Dreamers! We need to focus like it’s the final interview round and the questions are all about anorexia and current events. Now, I know y’all are upset. This is just plain awful. But God doesn’t make mistakes. Is this a setback, Teen Dreamers?’

“‘Totally,’ wailed Miss Arkansas. Her left arm was broken. It had been bandaged into a ninety-degree angle as if she were perpetually waving to an unseen crowd.

“‘No, ma’am. No, it is not. I know what Ladybird Hope would say. She would say that this is an opportunity for growth and the establishment of your personal brand. Everybody loves a survivor. And everybody loves a Miss Teen Dream contestant. When you put those two together, you have a lot of hope. And big endorsement opportunities when we get back. Let’s get a woo-hoo goin’!’

“A halfhearted chorus of ‘woo-hoo’ rippled through the horseshoe-shaped cluster of exhausted, hungry girls.

“Taylor shouted, ‘Now, I know y’all can be louder than that!’

“‘WOO-HOO!’

“‘That’s the Miss Teen Dream spirit. Sparkle Ponies, report: What did y’all salvage from the plane?’

“The girls listed off their bounty: four hot roller sets, two straightening irons, a few teeth-bleaching trays, five seat cushions, three waterlogged beauty magazines, a notebook, laxatives, diet pills, a few suitcases filled with clothes, evening gowns, a collection of mismatched bathing suit tops and bottoms, various shoes, bags of pretzels, and bottles of water.”

It’s actually surprising how well the girls do under these difficult conditions. To add to the fun, the author throws in that they have crashed on an island where a government conspiracy is taking place. What’s more, after some weeks, the cast of the reality show, Captains Bodacious IV: Badder and More Bodaciouser and their shipload of pirates, gets shipwrecked on the very same island.

That should give you the idea. It’s not intended to be realistic. (Or is it?) The story is punctuated with pageant data sheets about the contestants and “Commercial Breaks” in favor of products made by The Corporation. I loved lines like this: “Lady ‘Stache Off. Because there’s nothing wrong with you. . . that can’t be fixed.”

This book is good, silly fun with barbs pointed at our corporate culture. Definitely an entertaining read.

Buy from Amazon.com

Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Teens/beauty_queens.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a library book from the Fairfax County Public Library.

Review of The Name of the Star, by Maureen Johnson

Paranormal, Starred Review, Suspense, Teen Fiction Review 2

The Name of the Star

Shades of London
Book One

by Maureen Johnson

G. P. Putnam’s Sons, 2011. 372 pages.
Starred Review

On the same day that Rory Deveaux from Benouville, Louisiana, arrives in London for a year of boarding school, someone decides to imitate the murders of Jack the Ripper. The murders are gruesome and horrible, and keep arriving on schedule, with Rory’s school in the middle of Ripper territory. But the worst part about these new murders is that the victims can be seen on the closed circuit TV cameras posted all over London. But the person murdering them cannot be seen.

Then Rory begins seeing people that her friends don’t see. And on the night of one of the murders, one man in particular talks to her, but her roommate Jazza doesn’t even see him. He knows who she is and where she lives.

I don’t want to say too much more about the plot, because it’s all played out beautifully, with plenty of growing suspense as we begin to figure out, along with Rory, what is going on.

It all leads into a frightening and dangerous confrontation at the end, with a nice twist that assures us there will be more books about Rory. (Though the story in this book is complete, thank goodness! None of that awful “To Be Continued” stuff here.)

Now, call me sheltered, but I had no idea how gruesome Jack the Ripper’s murders were. I thought he just slit people’s throats or something. Using those details definitely raises the stakes in this novel. We want to see the murderer brought to justice, and we don’t want to see Rory fall into his clutches.

The non-paranormal part of the story is entertaining on its own with an American girl trying to fit in at an English boarding school. I fully sympathized with Rory’s horror at field hockey every single day.

I enjoyed the passage where she explains what she learned in the first week:

“Some other facts I picked up:

“Welsh is an actual, currently used language and our next-door neighbors Angela and Gaenor spoke it. It sounds like Wizard.

“Baked beans are very popular in England. For breakfast. On toast. On baked potatoes. They can’t get enough.

“‘American History’ is not a subject everywhere.

“England and Britain and the United Kingdom are not the same thing. England is the country. Britain is the island containing England, Scotland, and Wales. The United Kingdom is the formal designation of England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland as a political entity. If you mess this up, you will be corrected. Repeatedly.

“The English will play hockey in any weather. Thunder, lightning, plague of locusts . . . nothing can stop the hockey. Do not fight the hockey, for the hockey will win.

“Jack the Ripper struck for the second time very early on September 8, 1888.”

This is a well-written novel of suspense, but with lots of fun mixed in. I’m an avid follower of Maureen Johnson on Twitter, where she’s the funniest person ever, so I wasn’t at all surprised to love Rory’s voice. I am not a person who deliberately chooses to read scary books. Yet I thought this scary book was wonderful, and a whole lot of fun. I’m looking forward to future books.

Buy from Amazon.com

Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Teens/name_of_the_star.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on a book I ordered from Books of Wonder, signed by the author.

Review of Tuesdays at the Castle, by Jessica Day George

Children's Fiction Review, Fantasy, Starred Review 0

Tuesdays at the Castle

by Jessica Day George

Bloomsbury, New York, 2011. 232 pages.
Starred Review

I always wish for fantasy books to get some Newbery glory. It’s my favorite genre, and although some win, some years outstanding books get passed over. This year, the fantasy book I’m rooting for is Tuesdays at the Castle, by Jessica Day George.

Okay, it’s got some tough competition in the form of Okay For Now, by Gary Schmidt. Tuesdays at the Castle is much lighter fare, not covering big, heavy issues that come up in Okay for Now. However, what Tuesdays at the Castle does, providing a light, intriguing fantasy tale for middle grade readers, it does exceptionally well.

It’s a story of a medieval-type world with a princess at the center of the tale, yes. But the magical setting is highly unusual and delightfully different:

“Whenever Castle Glower became bored, it would grow a new room or two. It usually happened on Tuesdays, when King Glower was hearing petitions, so it was the duty of the guards at the front gates to tell petitioners the only two rules the Castle seemed to follow.

“Rule One: the Throne Room was always to the east. No matter where you were in the castle, if you kept heading east you would find the Throne Room eventually. The only trick to this was figuring out which way east was, especially if you found yourself in a windowless corridor. Or the dungeon.

“This was the reason that most guests stuck with Rule Two: if you turned left three times and climbed through the next window, you’d end up in the kitchens, and one of the staff could lead you to the Throne Room, or wherever you needed to go.

“Celie only used Rule Two when she wanted to steal a treat from the kitchens, and Rule One when she wanted to watch her father at work. Her father was King Glower the Seventy-Ninth, and like him, Celie always knew which way was east….

“The Castle didn’t seem to care if you were descended from a royal line, or if you were brave or intelligent. No, Castle Glower picked kings based on some other criteria all its own. Celie’s father, Glower the Seventy-Ninth, was the tenth in their family to bear that name, a matter of great pride throughout the land. His great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather had become king when Glower the Sixty-Ninth’s only heir had turned out to be a nincompoop. Legend had it that the Castle had repeatedly steered the old king’s hairdresser to the throne room via a changing series of corridors for days before the Royal Council had declared him the next king, and the young man who should have been Glower the Seventieth found himself head down in a haystack after having been forcibly ejected from the castle through the water closet.

“King Glower the Seventy-Ninth, Lord of the Castle, Master of the Brine Sea, and Sovereign of the Land of Sleyne, knew when to leave well enough alone. He married the beautiful daughter of the Royal Wizard when the Castle guided them into the same room and then sealed the doors for a day. He paid attention when the Castle gave people larger rooms or softer chairs. When his oldest son, Bran, kept finding his room full of books and astrolabes, while his second son, Rolf’s, bedroom was moved next to the Throne Room, King Glower sent Bran to the College of Wizardry and declared Rolf his heir.

“And when little Celie was sick, and the Castle filled her room with flowers, King Glower agreed with it. Everybody loved Celie, the fourth and most delightful of the royal children.”

But Celie ends up facing some big problems. Her parents go to Bran’s graduation from the College of Wizardry, and on the way home, they are attacked by bandits in the pass. Bran’s horse is found dead, but they don’t find the bodies of the royal family. However, the king’s Griffin Ring, which rumor says can only be removed at the king’s death, was found at the site of the attack.

Search parties are sent out, but the king and queen and Bran are not found. But things don’t look hopeful for them, and the ministers don’t want to be without a king. Princes from their neighboring countries come with armed guards, plus servants and advisors and ministers of state. Ostensibly they are coming for the funeral. But Celie and her brother and sister don’t want to have a funeral. Though there seems to be no reasonable hope of finding their father alive, the Castle has not yet turned Rolf’s bedroom into the Royal Bedchamber, where the Crown of Sleyne remains. So the current King Glower must still be alive.

But with the king missing, the neighboring kingdoms see Sleyne as weak. The ministers want to go ahead with Rolf’s coronation, but at fourteen they think he’s too young to rule, and will need a regent. The Castle is filled with foreign soldiers and now the foreign princes say they’re staying for Rolf’s coronation. How can Celie and her sister and brother salvage the situation and save the kingdom? And how can Celie use her knowledge of the castle to defend the country and her family?

The story that follows is inventive and suspenseful and wonderfully creative. One lovely thing about it is that, though there’s a little romance with Celie’s big sister, the main focus all the while is on Celie, who is firmly a child, about ten years old. I love it that this child saves the day, doing realistic things for a child and little sister to do. For example, Celie is interested in the Castle and has been mapping it out. She knows it better than anyone. Which enables her to go places no one else can go….

A huge strength of this book is its wonderfully imaginative setting, though perhaps I should say the strength is really
in the characterization, because the Castle is like a character itself. The three royal siblings left at the Castle are all distinct personalities and contribute to the solution in ways that are true to their character. And the plot is wonderful, too — with plenty of twists and turns showing up like castle corridors changing direction, but all arising naturally out of the inventive situation the author has created. This book is tremendous fun, and my favorite children’s fantasy book of the year so far.

Buy from Amazon.com

Find this review on Sonderbooks at: www.sonderbooks.com/Childrens_Fiction/tuesdays_at_the_castle.html

Disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate, and will earn a small percentage if you order a book on Amazon after clicking through from my site.

Source: This review is based on an Advance Review Copy I got at ALA Annual Conference.